This memorial website was created in the memory of Eddie Sinclair Jr. who was born in Newburgh, New York on June 25, 1985 and went home to be with the Angels on May 10, 2003 at the age of 17. He will forever be missed!!
Please light a candle or place a message in his tribute. We love to hear from you! My children and I are very grateful for all your love and support...
Eddie's Vigil May 10th 2007
Union County's DeathTrap!
look closer you can see the kids by the windows
We walked to the freeholders meeting to remind them of Eddie
Signing in to go upstairs to the meeting where I hold all freeholders of 2003 accountable for my son's death.
We stood up and told them not to forget Eddie died because, of them.
I will never let them forget you Eddie!!
Eddie passed away at a Juvenile detention center in Elizabeth, New Jersey. He was only there for 12 hrs before he died. The detention center called to tell me there had been an accident and for me to come down as soon as possible, all I could think about was where is Eddie? Is he at the hospital? Is he alright? They told me to hurry and come to the center now and I did only to have them tell me my son hung himself. I'd lost it... I was in a room where I tore everything up and that was when I realized what a nightmare truly was.
The County never let me identify my son. They did an autopsy and never even told me. They had 3 press releases and no one thought of me! I picked up the paper and all the while it was a story to everyone else, but for me, I was reading about my life in the newspaper. How could they do that to me and never once call to inform me. It was very hard because on one side of the paper they had a picture of my daughter with the governor and on the other page the story about my son without his name but, it was my son they were talking about.
I wrote to many authorized officials, trying to understand how could this happen in a "supposed to be secure" and safe environment for children. No one helped until we started protesting and shed light on what happened to Eddie. Family and friends protested and attended county meetings with pain in our hearts and so many unanswered questions.
***Update...please click on "his legacy" tab above...
Thank you..Y. Padilla (Eddie's mom)
It wasn't until I wrote to the Child State Advocate of New Jersey that brought hope and help started to come. He told me he would investigate the horrific incident and that would change the way people think about any child in those facilities!
Currently, I am seeking to have an Eddie's Law passed. If this law is passed, the county will not be able to get away with the injustice's they've had in the past. Every year we do a vigil for Eddie in hopes that this year I can begin to grieve; because so much work has gone into seeking JUSTICE!
A proud Puerto Rican and afro-american!!!
Great races in one beautiful young man.
This is what he thought about this world!!!
Eddies Favorite rap artists...
In the event of my Demise
When my heart can beat no more
I Hope I Die For A Principle
or A Belief that I had Lived for
I will die Before My Time
Because I feel the shadow's Depth
so much I wanted to accomplish
before I reached my Death
I have come to grips with the possibility
and wiped the last tear from My eyes
I Loved All who were Positive
In the event of my Demise
By Tupac Shakur
Eddie, would always blast his boom box to his music and I sometimes would say "Turn it down" I miss my Eddie so much he would always be the one to tell me Ma, this is that new shit! He always had a cd with a new and upcoming artist to put on me. I miss that so much!! He would listen to all rap artists, r&b, spanish and even some old school like Frankie Lymon He would annoy me with "Why do fools fall in love" But, I know now because I will forever love my Eddie.
First thing I want you to know about Eddie, he was always giving whatever he had he would always share. Family was a big thing to him,especially when I couldn't see it. I guess its because my family never really done anything as what we have done, together. I realize being with Eddie is what family meant. He taught us so much in such a short time. It was only after he passed that I tried getting closer to my own family.
Eddie, with his siblings...Shyasia, Justin and Tamia
Eddie was into music, playing the playstation, x box whatever video game was out he would play it till he got good enough to beat his friends and then act like it was his first time playing. I knew better than to play any games with him because he would always cheat.
I never knew how many lives my son touched until he passed and I know he probably didn't know either
He was into making his own designs for clothes and trying to be different that he would get some of his friends and cousins to wear stuff and all I would do is laugh. He had a dream of opening a store with his friends and cousins.
He was my life and I was only 17 years old when I had Eddie and we grew up together learning from one another. He is truly my inspiration for life and family. That is one thing no one could ever take away. I will always love and miss you, Sin.
You will be forever love and remembered.
***WRITTEN BY DAWN ELMORE
DEAREST MAMA,I SEE HOW MUCH YOU MISS ME AND WISH I WEREN'T GONE. I TOOK A PART OF YOU WITH ME THE DAY GOD CALLED ME HOME.
PLEASE TRY TO UNDERSTAND DEAR MAMA,THAT WE'RE NOT THAT FAR APART,FOR I'LL BE FOREVER NEAR BECAUSE I HAVE YOUR HEART. I KNOW THERE'S TIMES YOU FEEL THERE'S NO REASON TO GO ON, YOU WISH YOU COULD BE WITH ME,AND YOU HAVE BEEN ALL ALONG.JUST BECAUSE I WENT HOME AND I'M IN THE MASTER'S HANDS DOESN'T MEAN I'M NOT STILL WITH YOU...BESIDE YOU'S WHERE I STAND. PLEASE TRY TO UNDERSTAND DEAR MAMA, THAT I'LL ALWAYS LOVE YOU SO,I CAN'T STAND TO SEE YOU HURTING SO THERE'S SOMETHING YOU SHOULD KNOW.
EACH TIME YOU FEEL THE SUNSHINE UPON YOUR LOVELY FACE,IT'S ME SMILING DOWN UPON YOU AND TOUCHING YOU WITH GOD'S SWEET EMBRACE.EACH NIGHT YOU'RE SAD AND LONELY AND THE TEARS YOU CAN'T CONTROL. I'M RIGHT THERE BESIDE YOU AND I NEVER WILL LET GO. GOD TOLD ME TO TELL YOU THAT HE KNOWS YOUR PAIN INSIDE. FOR HE LOST HIS SON TOO,UPON THAT CROSS HE DIED. HE WASN'T TRYING TO HURT YOU BY CALLING ME HOME SO SOON,THERE'S JUST PLANS THAT HE HAD FOR ME THAT NO ONE ELSE COULD DO. I WANT TO THANK YOU DEAREST MAMA,FOR ALL YOU GAVE TO ME,BUT MOST OF ALL, I THANK GOD BECAUSE YOU'RE THE BEST MOTHER ONE COULD BE. SO, EACH TIME YOU THINK OF ME AND TEARS FILL YOUR EYES,WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE GIVING UP, JUST LOOK UP TO THE SKIES.LIFE ON EARTH IS HARD, I KNOW,BUT YOU MUST BE SO STRONG.FOR I'LL BE FOREVER WITH YOU UNTIL GOD CALLS YOU HOME. I LOVED YOU FROM THE START AND I LOVE YOU STILL, PLEASE DON'T GIVE UP,MAMA,FOR IT'S JUST NOT IN GOD'S WILL. I NEVER WILL FORSAKE YOU, I'LL BE THERE EVERYDAY,I'LL HOLD YOU IN MY ANGEL WINGS AND GUIDE YOU ON YOUR WAY. ALTHOUGH, I'M GONNA GO NOW, REMEMBER IT'S NOT FOR LONG. FOR I'LL STAND BESIDE YOU THROUGH IT ALL AND I'M NEVER REALLY GONE. I LOVE YOU MORE THAN WORDS CAN SAY AND I HATE TO KNOW YOU FEEL SO LOST.JUST REMEMBER WE WILL MEET AGAIN CAUSE JESUS LEFT THAT CROSS.
Written by his cousin Alberto Torres
WE DID NOT KNOW THE PAIN YOU HAD OR HEAR YOUR FINAL SIGH. WE ONLY KNOW YOUR LIFE WAS OVER WITHOUT A LAST GOOD-BYE. GOD KNEW YOU HAD TO LEAVE US, BUT YOU DIDN'T GO ALONE., FOR A PART OF EACH OF US WENT WITH YOU THE MORNING GOD TOOK YOU HOME. TO SOME YOU WILL SOON BE FORGOTTEN, TO OTHERS JUST A PART OF THE PAST, BUT TO US WHO LOVED AND LOST YOU YOUR MEMORY WILL ALWAYS LAST. GOD GAVE US STRENGTH TO FACE IT AND COURAGE TO BEAR THE BLOW, BUT WHAT IT MEANT TO LOSE YOU EDDIE NO ONE BUT NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW!!
WILL LOVE YOU
FOREVER AND EVER
Bereaved Parents Wish List
I wish my child hadn't died. I wish I had him back.
I wish you wouldn't be afraid to speak my child's name. My child lived and was very important to me. I need to hear that he was important to you also.
If I cry and get emotional when you talk about my child, I wish you knew that it isn't because you have hurt me. My child's death is the cause of my tears. You have talked about my child and you have allowed me to share my grief. I thank you for both.
Being a bereaved parent is not contagious, so I wish you wouldn't shy away from me. I need you now more than ever.
I need diversions, so I do want to hear about you, but I also want you to hear about me. I might be sad and I might cry, but I wish you would let me talk about my child; my favorite topic of the day
I know that you think of and pray for me often. I also know that my child's death pains you too. I wish you would let me know these things through a phone call, a card or note, or a real big hug.
I wish you wouldn't expect my grief to be over. These few years are traumatic for me, but I wish you could understand that my grief will never be over. I will suffer the death of my child until the day I die.
I am working hard in my recovery, but I wish you could understand that I will never fully recover. I will always miss my child and I will always grieve that he is dead.
I wish you wouldn't expect me "not to think about it" or "be happy". Neither will happen for a very long time, so don't frustrate yourself.
I don't want to have a "Pity party", but I do wish you would let me grieve. I must hurt before I can heal.
I wish you understood how my life has shattered. I know it is miserable for you to be around me when I'm feeling miserable. Please be as patient with me as I am with you.
When I say, "I'm doing okay", I wish you could understand that I don't "feel" okay and that I struggle daily. I wish you knew that all of the grief reactions I'm having are very normal. Depression, anger, hopelessness and overwhelming sadness are all to be expected. So please excuse me when I'm quiet and withdrawn or irritable and cranky.
Your advice to "take it one day at a time" is excellent advice. However, a day is too much and too fast for me right now. I wish you could understand that I'm doing good to handle an hour at a time.
Please excuse me if I seem rude, certainly not my intent. Sometimes the world around me goes too fast and I need to get off. When I walk away, I wish you would let me find a quiet place to spend time alone.
I wish you understood that grief changes people. When my child died, a big part of me died with him. I am not the same person I was before my child died and I will never be that person again.
I wish very much that you could understand; understand my loss and my grief. But, I pray daily that you will never " fully " understand....Y. Padilla
Prayer for Trust in Jesus
O Christ Jesus,
when all is darkness
and we feel our weakness and helplessness,
give us the sense of Your presence,
Your love, and Your strength.
Help us to have perfect trust
in Your protecting love
and strengthening power,
so that nothing may frighten or worry us,
for, living close to You,
we shall see Your hand,
Your purpose, Your will through all things.
- St. Ignatius of Loyola
Almighty God, Father of all mercies and giver of all comfort: Deal graciously, we pray thee, with those who mourn, that casting every care on thee, they may know the consolation of thy love, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Cleanse my soul in the dews of spring,
Light of mind's refreshing dew
Love of heart's renewing dew,
Life being's restoring dew,
Cleanse and recreate my soul this night.
May the souls of all beings be
From fall of night
Till day's dear light.
One night I had a dream. I was walking along
the beach with the Lord, and across the skies flashed
scenes from my life. In each scene I noticed two sets
of footprints in the sand. On was mine, and one
was the Lord's.
When the last scene of my life appeared before
me, I looked back at the footprints in the sand, and
to my surprise I noticed that many times along the
path of my life there was only one set of footprints.
And I noticed that it was at the lowest and saddest
times in my life.
I asked the Lord about it. "Lord, you said that
once I decided to follow you, you would walk with
me all the way. But I noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life there is only one set of
footprints. I don't understand why you left my side
when I needed you most."
The Lord replied, "My precious child, I love you
and would never leave you. During your time of
Trial and suffering, where you see only one set of
footprints, I was carrying you."
Eddie wrote this poem before he passed away....
No one knew what kind of pain you endure when you were in there. I wish I knew...I could of saved you and have you here with me.
Yo, Whats up Edwardo? I never thought as a parent I would have had to witness someone with so much life be gone, to tell ur mother that there was no more life in her son! I was in shock! I felt it was unreal, untill the funeral. Sometimes I still hear ur laugh and u saying YEAH!!!! Ur favorite saying.
You charmed everyone with your spirit and everybody knew u was in the room. I miss u and it feels like ur still with ur father in Vermont but, in my heart of hearts ur with the Angels watching over the family. I still feel ur presence. Everybody goes to church to pray for a better place but, I know with ur situation Ur resting in peace. Because they say God is forgiving and mercifull and if he see all and know all he knew what u was going through and took u in his Arms...Omar Beeks
I wish you were here. Then you could share all of the silly moments with Tamia. I know you would have loved her alot, but even though you've passed your watching us from a better place. I remember the last words you said to me were "Don't eat all the honey buns!!! I love you." All I can say now is "I love you, miss you and wish you were her." I cry almost everyday but at least your up above watching over us!!!...Shyasia, Eddie's sister.
It was 8th grade when i met you....u were "one of the cute boys" that walked around my block.....u were at the first house party i ever snuck to lol.....afterwards we all chilled outside.....seein u around my way always made me smile, bcuz u had a smile that could light up the whole block, ur tall a** lol.....i remember u in ur black n red fitted wit ur black t on....always comin by wit christian and peachy n them.....when i heard u got locked up it bothered me but i figured ud b out like all our boys were eventually.....but u aint make it....lord knows wat REALLY happened but i kno that that was one of the worst things that happened to all of us freshman year....it hit us hard....the school was filled wit RIP EDDIE......you knew everyone, especially the ladies lol.....when we came together it was like nothing ive ever seen, so many kids together, no beef, with so much respect for wut was going on....everyone goes to ur house like its our own now....i guess we go see ur mom cuz u cant anymore, althought u look down on her every day.....that ladys one of a kind, ur mother loves u like no other, and she wont give up, NOPE not on her baby.....the tat she got of u on her arm is official, but wuts even more dope is the one she carries around in her heart....ur little brother is takin after you , gettin cuter by the day, the ladies will b on him like they were on u lol.....and ur little sisters adorable....its like took u but sent her, shes ur moms little gift from u......i love you eddie and ill never forget you....your mom carries a special place in my heart----Stephanie Bastos
My life without u hurts so much! Everyday I think of u and there is nothing I can do to bring u back. So I keep reliving the memories of better days when I didn't know what a waking nightmare truly was.
MISSING U & LOVING U 4EVA!! MAMI